A little war within

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i am shaken.

a new lover that rattles my own fear. a new lover that draws from the inner depths of my soul a beastly little mind trap demon. a new lover that places me like a trophy on a pedestal where i confront myself all alone.

this has nothing to do with your actions my darling. you are unaware of how much your presence torments the bullseye of my nucleus.

it is your love. your sincerity. your honesty. your vulnerability. your desire. your openness. your expressive discourse, and your quick mind that engage my weakness and blow thunder through my veins.

my fear makes me greedy. i want to run away. i want to hide. i want to be with you but i am agitated by a confidence crisis.

here is what i tell myself: let go. fall. let go. be. let go. accept. let go. have faith. let go. learn. let go. smile. let go. the moment has already passed. let go. nothing is important. let go. life is short. let go. live. love. understand. be vulnerable. trust.

and maybe tomorrow when i wake up or later today doing nothing, the reigns of attachment will release and you will see my hidden centre.

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