isn’t it weird how time stand still with some people?
parents for example. i watch mine grow older but when i am with them i have not aged i am still that little girl, no grey hairs, wisdom slips away and we fall gently into our roles and there i remain frozen in time with them. even from a distance when i look at myself in the mirror and think of them i see a girl, i almost see myself through their parental eyes and when i look in the mirror and focus on myself i see the woman i am and have yet to become, an image they will appreciate but, i think, never choose to hold.
i love those frozen moments in time. i love the tsunami just before things start to work out and you realise all that hassle was leading to something so ridiculously wonderful it should have been so obvious but at the time you bailed and swallowed gallons of salty water. then when the seas are calm again, the sun is rising, and there is a future on the horizon you think it’s not about the destination it’s the journey that counts and you think you have it all figured out until another storm hits. but each storm cleanses you and puts you back on your path.
it’s been 6 years since i went home to canada. i have no idea (and at the same time every idea) how that happened. it’s time to go home. touch base and feel my roots again. the strange and partially difficult part is being who i’ve become because home is frozen in time for me. 6 years ago i was someone else just like for my parents i am still their baby girl. starting new relationships with family is bizarre. it’s almost like meeting them for the first time….