Maria drives me crazy. she drives me crazy in the most appetizing and satiating way. i want it. she´s fiery and whiny and listless and childish and none of it bothers me enough to distance myself from her. in fact i want to get closer. i keep learning new things about myself with her and i like it. i feel my boundaries being tested and flexed, my mind being deliciously inspired again  and my soul nourished. i feel totally natural and in my self around her and i don´t know why. i express myself confidently and freely without hesitation or doubt, i do not hide my moods rather express them comfortably. i even feel less desperate desire for sexual satisfaction, even though i am not sexually attracted nor are we getting it on but it is as if just her presence is fulfilling something that was so deeply missing within me. in a way i feel i have my my soul sister. she´s someone who i allow to push my limits and who i look forward to catching up with everyday despite her intensity, and who i make an effort to be present with which is unusual for me as i like my alone quiet time and don´t know many people i would want to see everyday! i feel like she is teaching me to unforgivably truly be myself and she doesn´t even know it. it feels beautiful, it feels like a home coming of sorts.


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